Reflections on the First Year of Marriage

My blog is a tad behind. We have been away for two weeks in Utah for my brother Steve’s wedding; which was perfect of course. Where should I begin? Hmmm… since I was thinking that this blog post would be marriage related I think that I will only focus on that for this time; however there many other adventures needless to say.

First let me explain how wonderful it was to be inside the sealing room with my family as I watched my brother kneel across the alter from his beautiful bride. The emotions of gratitude and happiness overwhelmed me and I was crying from joy. I thought of my wedding just three years prior when Ed and I were in the same position. All the promises and blessings given to us at that moment were too much to take in, so it was nice to listen again to sealer’s words.

After the wedding and reading a new book I have been contemplating my first year of marriage. The book is called “Joy in the Morning” by Betty Smith. It was such a beautiful story of a young couple’s first year of marriage. It was funny as I read all the adjustments that those two had to make as they learned to live together. I laughed as I read some stories that were similar to my adjustments. I won’t go into details as I don’t want to ruin it for anyone who would like to read it. The book took me only two days so it’s a nice easy read that warms the heart that and comes strongly recommended.

Yesterday I decided to start reading the biography of Gordon B. Hinckely, 15th President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. As members of the church we believe that he is the Prophet, Seer, and Revelator for the entire world. This is a huge responsibility given to only the most worthy of men. My next comment on the adjustments of marriage is taken from this book.

"Shortly after they had announced their engagement (Gordon B. Hinckley and Marjorie Pay), Emma Marr Peterson, Mark E. Peterson's wife, had warned Marjorie that the first ten years of marriage would be the hardest. Her comment both puzzled and shocked Marjorie, who later admitted: 'I was just sure that the first ten years would be bliss. But during our first year together I discovered that she was dead right! There were a lot of adjustments. Of course they weren't the kind of thing that you ran home to mother about. But I cried into my pillow now and again. The problems were almost always related to learning to live on someone else's schedule and to do things someone else's way. We loved each other, there was no doubt about that. But we also had to get used to each other. I think every couple has to get used to each other'."
- Go Forward With Faith: The Biography of Gordon B. Hinckley by Sheri L. Dew

This brought me comfort as I read it knowing that even future Prophet and his wife had adjustments to make. I know that Ed and I certainly did; it didn’t help that I was pregnant and a “tad” emotional by the end of our honeymoon. It’s funny talking to Ed about it now as we both laugh. He couldn’t figure out why I suddenly turned into a bag and I was confused about why I married such an insensitive jerk. A few weeks later we found out I was pregnant and we had our “a-ha” moment. A similar episode occurred last February… sure enough we now have Lexi.

A few days after the wedding I was able to ask my brother how he liked being married and he said that it was better than he imagined. I completely agreed with him being married is great. I love Ed and I wouldn’t change a thing. The adjustments are normal and we can laugh at them now… they only build a stronger relationship. Remember the upside-down sandwich in Chicago Ed? Love you lots!